Humorous quotes - Mark Twain

American author Mark Twain had a very quick, ascerbic wit. There are hudreds of quotes we could have used, but here are just a few to whet your appetite. We may feature more at a later date.

 

"The report of my death was an exaggeration."

 

"You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label!"

 

 

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"When I was a boy of 14 my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21 I was astonished by how much he'd learned in 7 years!"

 

"Wagner's music is better than it sounds!"

 

"Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times!"

 

 

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"Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and I now wish to withdraw the statement."

 

 

 

 

 


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